Couldn't Have Asked For More

This is so sweet!
Posted by Anthony Ramsey on Thursday, December 17, 2015

On a normal Sat morning, I was js scrolling through my fb newsfeed. Something struck me when I watched a video of a child crying tears of joy, hugging his foster parents and not letting go after opening his Christmas gift. It was a letter of adoption. He was an orphan. I teared up and immediately felt a surge of gratitude. 

Gratitude

- For a family with a loving environment

- For growing up without lacking life necessities (that includes the internet xP)

- For having the freedom of choice. Because for many, there are obstacles in their life that hinder them from making choices. Mostly due to financial constrain and family expectations. 

Being in the polyclinic in a rural area made me grateful for the things I have in my life. A teenage girl spoke to me about her dream to further her studies and work that was cut short when she married a guy (through an arranged marriage) at the age of 17. Her husband does not permit her to work so she has been reduced to performing mere household chores. She has no financial control, but sells a little of her garden produce to earn a small amount of pocket money for herself. 

In this modern era (lol sounds like i'm writing an essay for english exam) I cannot believe how a person can live in such a condition. Dreams that were cut short by a lack of farsightedness of those around her. It was as though they had no vision in life, but to just survive day by day, stuck in the cycle of poverty. I learnt that many families in the rural areas encourage their children to get married at a young age so that the burden of supporting that child is then on the husband (who is still in his teens, also a mere child if u ask me). The youngest mother my clinic has recorded is aged 13. These teens grow up with the life goal of getting married and having children. 

Flabbergasted. 

Hopelessness or helplessness? 

Perhaps both. 

I am blessed. To have grown up with the gift of choice and to have parents who had vision for my future. It's only right to do justice to that by living life to the fullest and continuing to chase my dreams. 

Closing this book, yet to open another.

The past few months have been a little of a whirlwind. A while ago, I was watching my close friends leave one by one, going on to pursue the next stage of their career. And I was awaiting my turn, knowing it's just around the corner. Before I knew it, housemanship ended. What's next? It's an independent journey of pursuing your dream. whether it's a certain area of specialty, building a family, getting that dream house or visiting a beautiful foreign country. What's next is a journey of self improvement and reaching life goals while not forgetting your roots.

To be honest, it can be pretty scary. After settling in my comfort zone in Sibu for the past 2 years, I'm moving on. Going back to Kuching. Guess i'm lucky in that sense to be posted somewhere near home.

Nostalgia kicks in as I countdown my last few days in this quaint old town with undulating roads that I have grown so familiar to. There are so many things here that I will miss. The workplace, colleagues and bosses. The hospital canteen that sells chinese food (oh so rare). The kopitiams' foochow food (seriously love foochow food). The old school cinema and my fav Nichii store. The cute kiddos in my uncle's house.

Many friends have gone on to district hospitals, clinics or stayed on in Sibu, becoming medical officers who carry big ass responsibilities for patients. There are many bosses whom I look up to as role models, bearing astounding qualities that I strive to have. Stepping into their shoes now.

Solemnity aside, vacation was real awesome. :P The snow capped mountains, blue lakes, green pastures that I could only imagine from my Geography textbook 10 yrs ago (ok la 12 years ago), came to live! Not just pictures of the sheeps and alpacas, but real ones. :P hehe. Baaaa!

Auckland city, the capital of NZ with the Skytower in view

The Luge. Super fun ride, like a go kart. they also have challenging trails for seasoned Lugers.

The hot spring and geyser at Rotorua

Lake Rotorua in the wee hours of the morning. 

Cherry blossoms!

Cudnt help doing this shot hiding behind the cute bushes xD oh so furry looking

Alpacas

Lake Te Anau

The rocky mountains at Milford Sound National Park

Queenstown lake

Where i did not bungy jump. lols. I have not overcome the fear.

Some awesome choc wrappers. 

A common sight along the bus trail. More sheeps than peeps!

Lake Tekapo. Loving the icy mountain range behind the crystal blue waters.

A little friend I brought back. His name is Scott. :P Brother says it looks like a dog?? I beg to differ!

And... Boracay was a trip up north to Philippines filled with beautiful sandy beaches, blue skies and sea, sipping on cocktails by the seaside with the live band playing

The fabulous four reunited!

 

U can take a ride on a yatch during the sunset. Totally worth it. 

Obligatory photo of coconut trees

A glimpse of the turqoise coloured sea

Every trip had its memorable part. Our trip to Krabi two years back saw us suffering from severe muscle ache after 3 hours of kayaking and climbing 1000 steps up a hill. (really damn painful, sleepless nights can die)
This year, quote Shalisha, we had the whole slumdog millionaire experience. We went to boracay during the monsoon season (i forgot to check the weather before booking the air tix) so it was rainy on alternate days. (all the awesome pictures were taken on the sunny days lol) unfortunately on our snorkelling day it rained like crazay so we were chill to the bones and shivering in the boat and waded through ankle deep waters on some streets to get back to our hotel. xD note to self, no more island trips in the future and to check the weather before deciding on a trip destination.

A few memorable shots from not too long ago.

the girls i can talk absolute nonsense with

grace's farewell to hkl

HO night 2014 with dearest Durga

ortho gang from first posting

the lovely girls in my cell group

So..... goodbye Hospital Sibu, hello clinic!

Back to the wards

So here I am sitting at my desk, contemplating on the next crossroad of my life.
I remember saying how bad I was in dealing with emergencies, how stressful and nerve wrecking it was in the Obs and Gynae attachement, how much I despised the constant hum and beep of the cardiotocograph monitoring of ladies in labour. However, to my surprise, I actually enjoyed my last four months in Emergency and Trauma department. Sure it was more tiring and energy draining physically and mentally bcz of the constant inflow of cases being first line, fresh, unstable, uncomfortable patients. But I did enjoy the posting. Due to a number of factors altogether. Great medical officers as bosses who talk to you as a colleague and friend, discussions and Q&A that were not threatening, was I think one of the biggest factor that made the work interesting and fun filled. There were still haphazard times when the ETD would be crammed full with patients, some more patient, some more demanding, and you struggle to clear the load, scan and treat fast, breathe in and take the plunge to make referrals on vague cases. I wouldnt say i came out unscathed or as a superwoman, but perhaps more confident and able to make better decisions in the face of an emergency. Warm staff, fun times, several eye candies. haha. :) I definitely left with a smile.

Took the plunge into peads one month ago. yeps its the final countdown. wouldn't say im in a hurry to finish up the training, there's still tons to learn about ill children, but i cant doubt there's a small clock ticking at the back of my head, counting the number of weeks i have to deal /work with irritable cold blooded ward staff. well several of them. lols. definitely miss the banter and warmth of the staff from the ETD. some people say its bcz they face more ward politics, its more stressful in the ward... i guess I could hardly agree. I can name many places with higher stress levels, and even if so, stress does not justify rude behaviour, talking down to another individual, ordering ppl around and sarcasm (that's without wit). oh how much bitterness there must be in these individuals. The most I can do is to try to not take it to heart, roll my eyes and let it go. My eyes have been rolled so frequently that it's a wonder they havent rolled out of their sockets.

On a brighter note, I've conquered the fear towards children. The scary medical school years took a turn. Always had an imminent fear towards pediatrics bcz it was made to seem so tough during the medical school years. Large scary intimidating professors looming behind you waiting to fail your assessment. That was the impression of peads that I left med school with unfortunately. So I have never considered venturing or furthering in this area.

Surprisingly, it turned out to be quite pleasant to see ill children. Not in that way. grins. you get what i mean. Ill children can still be playful and adorable. And when they recover, they are even happier, with cuteness level being proportionate to their happiness. Never imagined that i would be smiling and playing with cute children during my morning review. XD that kinda compensates for the evil that i face on the other side. haha. i did have a second of thought on whether i should do peads instead of adult medicine. it shook me a little. i dont know. :P

Anws, its great to have an offday per week once again. Sigh of relief. Looking forward to the vacation at the end. :) Not looking forward to the Post Raya influx of patients. hahah. Its coming... Shudder....

Never in my life I thought I would be reunited with these two girls in Sibu. :P

A good friend who walked with me in one of the biggest parts of my life. Missing you already.

The girls who add colour to life outside the hospital

Awesome bunch of friends who have completed housemanship and gone on to face bigger adventures

It's transition year all over again. =')

If only I was a minion without a care in the world

I realise that things have been getting on my nerves more frequently lately. There are only a couple of possibilities.

1) That there really are more annoying things going on

2) Things are the same. It's just me. I got more cranky.

3) It's just me. Maybe, just maybe previously I had an above average patience level but now it's just down to that of a normal being.

4) I got more time on my hands and am thinking too much

Regardless of the reasons, I guess it's time for me to relearn to chill, forgive, chuck any unhappy episode down the bin, tell myself no one is perfect and focus on building happy memories. Why waste seconds in your life with bitterness? 

Nevertheless, every being needs time to heal. The difference lies in how fast we are able to do it. Screw it. I want to be happy. How paradoxical did that just sound. haha. 

Right now I just feel like jumping onto a soft bed of freshly laundered sheets filled with the cutest plush toys in the world and wake up to a holiday. bahaha. banana. cheers. I'm just a minion i mean human.

your average working lady rant

Everyday feels like an endless race. The race against time to toil then sleep, sleep then toil. I won't deny it. I am tired. It shows on my face even at the start of the day. Help! When will this end? Need a break, need a holiday. The temptation to take emergency leave is there when the exhaustion builds up to a near breaking point. Sleeping doesnt take the exhaustion away. u find yourself waking up to your biological alarm clock but in a state of fatigue and blur. running on a hamster's wheel and cant get off. just have to hang in there till my leave.. sigh...

So getting old... :/ sobs

Mostly Unseen, Not Unknown

I went, I saw and I experienced. No i did not conquer :P

In the past if you had talked to me about the Orang Asli tribe, my knowledge about their origin, distribution, socioeconomic background and current status would be limited to the few malnourished children I saw in Hospital Teluk Intan during my medical school years. I knew they were not well off, but that was all.

Venturing into their houses and talking to them while they tell me about their ailments gave me a better idea. In many ways their conditions resemble some of the bumiputera people in the deep rural parts of Sarawak that I meet in Hospital Sibu.

I had expected to meet mostly aches and pains. Hence the load of painkillers I brought with me.
However, to my surprise, there were quite a number of poorly controlled or undiagnosed non communicable diseases among them as well!

So here you go, on my take of my past four days in Kahang, Bentong, Pulau Ketam and Carey Island. :P

1. The hypertensive folks
first reading: 170/100. confirmed by a near second reading. no anxiety, claims Pak. No symptoms. Pak cik slalu makan ikan masin/telur masin? Taakk.... jarang jarang... OR Ye... kalau tak, nak makan ape? (and there u go, unable to ask them to cut down on salted food bcz poverty is a limiting factor for them to eat healthy). however, one cannot let BP this high go uncontrolled. Referral letter to the PK it is. I could advise lifestyle change, advise him to get to the nearest PK in a week with the letter, but I could not take over a PK's ability to supply him with 3 months of anti HPT and monitor kidney function and complications. Nearest PK being 30mins/1 hour away on a borrowed motor vehicle for him.

the second type of HPT would be those who are known cases, diagnosed few yrs back, but defaulted treatment due to lack of awareness and logistics. Met a number of BP 200-220/120-140. Gave them Nifedipine and begged their kids or neighbours to shoot them to the nearest PK for proper Management.

Little did they know that the imminent risk of stroke, heart attack and kidney failure lurk at their door. Knock, knock who's there.

2. The long standing infection
Whether diagnosed or undiagnosed, they pose a huge threat to immediate contacts.
There were several highly suspicious of Pulmonary Tuberculosis (TB). Chronic cough for months that get relieved short term by Benadryl from PKs or OTC without TB workup. One fella had matted cervical lymph nodes, was cachexic and had even developed gastrointestinal symptoms.

The Hygiene Issue
Bcz of lack of proper tap water supply, they drink rain water, worst case being river water. The River, number one culprit in seeding potential deadly diseases among the folks. The rivers run through the oil palm plantation and reaches their homes, where water is used for any purpose you can possibly think of.
Now imagine a baby drinking river water. NoooOoooOoooooo

Scabies, Fungal infections, Infected wounds were common.

3. The Malnourished
There was a whole bunch of children on Carey Island and Pulau Ketam all below the 5th centile for height and weight to age. They were so tiny. They were no doubt the most adorable bunch of children i came across, huge starry eyes, toothy grin (they need serious dental intervention), frizzy hair. but their state of nourishment breaks your heart.
Referral for Food Basket!!!

3, The Unknown or Lesser Seen
Now among the few hundred we saw, one or two cases stood out.
One was what we thought was a cystic hygroma.
Another was a little girl with skin lesion that looked like warts.
Another was a 15 year old boy weighing 29kg and 130cm tall. (this one was less of a mystery but still warranted investigation)

My general thoughts and take backs?

- IT IS NOT EASY to be a General Practitioner. These guys are most important first liners in seeing patients and referring them to the upstream line when indicated.
Walao... Day 3 into the project and I was exhausted. Mentally, physically, emotionally. PK (polyclinics) need more support then you know.
And maybe I need to exercise to build up my stamina. hehe.

- There is still a lot of ground work required for the marginalised in society.
Look at you and me. Tech gadgets, proper homes, clean drinking water, hot showers, air conditioned rooms, the availability of the magic Panadol (grins) in nearby local stores to cure the headache and pains.

A villager's home (a self built hut on stilts) just got destroyed by a gust of strong wind 1 week ago, leaving him homeless. :(

Where the government refuse to provide, (or rather there is so much red tape that it takes 10 years to give someone a brick house) our compassion will have to provide.

- No one is less equal than another.
You, me, him. We all deserve education, security and love.

This trip gave us some food for thought for further improvement. In future, I think I would stock up more on antibacterial cream, anti hypertensive medication and deworming pills. :P

Who are we? We are called My3K (short for Pertubuhan Kebajikan dan Kesedaran Kesihatan Malaysia). We are an NGO pioneered by ppl in the healthcare line (pharmacists, doctors, audiologists, optometrists, dentists) in our university days with the primary goal of helping the Orang Asli ppl in unreachable areas. We are still small, starting up new and require volunteers and funds to get better equipment and medication for future projects. Equipments include dental treatment set for extraction/cleaning/patching (dont mind me for wrong term usage, i'm a doctor not a dentist hehe), eye check sets, glasses and lenses etc. We;re on facebook as www.facebook.com/ngomy3k

Let me know if u r interested to volunteer or contribute :) it will change your life.

Managed to throw in a bowl of Super Kitchen's Chilli Pan Mee before i left KL. :D owh the magical chilli flakes!

A short excerpt on the last four months of my HOship. Surgical department. I think those 4 months were filled with more drama than my entire past year of hoship could gather. hahah. There were ups and downs, but they made me stronger. No doubt I left with many lessons learnt, and many individuals that i am thankful for. :) Up next, emergency department. :P

Hi there 2015

Hello 2015!
Still sounds a bit of an alien to the ears. But the coming year is no doubt going to be an interesting one. It's the year of another transition into trainee to registered Dr. :P

Its been a year plus settling in Sibu, found my comfort zone, built up great friendship, support and in my 4th posting of hoship now. Sibu is a great place. :) Great foochow food (cant doubt the foochow blood running in my veins anymore hehe). Seriously loads of good food here. Nothing beats mum's cooking thats for sure, but the hawker food here is great. It's not easy to stay slim in HOship anymore now. haha.

Malas to look retrospectively into 2014, so a retrospect of the past few weeks shall suffice. grins.
Awesome days catching The Hobbit (yes i am a die hard fan), Night at the museum (laughed my head off), Penguins (love the randomness). ok penguins was a bit more far back. hehe. any more upcoming good blockbusters?? (i should stop spending and start saving groans)

Had a awesome trip to Tioman this year with the debaters. And joined a camp with some orang asli folks in Selangor. was truly an eye opening experience.

I guess this year was a year of independence, getting accustomed and maturing as a working adult, financial control?? haha, and being awed by God's work in my life time and again.

Truly grateful for the awesome friends and colleagues I have met over the year. And grateful to the friends who still keep in touch, unwavered by distance separation.

Looking forward to greater things in the coming year.

Let's see if I get to
- Join the Miri jazz festival
- Hop on a trip to Melbourne
- Sit for an exam
- Catch the next Mission Impossible (or rather, any movie with Tom Cruise in it)
- Watch another Ben Stiller movie
- Catch any musical in KL or Spore

hmm that's all of the fun things i can think of atm.

Happy 2015 :)