Awareness. Rather, the lack of it.

Awareness is something that gains you insight. It changes your mind, deepens your understanding and prevents you from embarrassment or making out-of-this-world remarks. No kidding.

Lately I had a personal encounter with a person (given the benefit of the doubt) who lacked awareness. And obvious tactfulness. either that or he was really evil in nature. lol.

I was having lunch with a friend who is blind. 100% loss of vision. so something startled her in the coffeeshop and she was afraid and clutched my hand. something along that line. and this dude sitting next to our table, looked at me in the eye and asked 'Is he toothpick?'  i was like ...??? Sorry??? he repeated it like 5 times. forgive me. his pronunciation was really hard to comprehend. finally i got what he was saying. he said 'Is she stupid'. 

can u believe your ears? even if he was dumb enough to think so, it was utterly unacceptable that he asked me that.

i retorted NO SHE'S NOT and ignored him. I mean a person this ignorant and blunt (saying he's blunt is giving him a MOUNTAIN of benefit of the doubt that he didn't mean to be rude) isn't worth the time explaining to or giving a response to. 

now lets look at the situation. there are two possibilities.

a) He really didn't know she was blind and might have meant mentally handicapped but didnt know how to phrase it so he used the word stupid. he might have thought the word stupid is acceptable bcz (now this part of reasoning is really hard) bcz.. er... in his upbringing he uses the word stupid like saying hello or bye to his friends. 

in this case, he stone cold lacks awareness.

1) how do u recognise blind people?

2) what are their needs?

3) how do you help without causing more trouble?

4) what does it mean to be mentally handicapped?

5) how to greet people without getting beaten up.

Interestingly, I learnt a little about how to help the blind without causing more chaos on that day n thought it'd be helpful to share it here.

1. if u wana lead them to cross roads or to navigate them to places, they usually hold the white cane in their right hand. so take them by their left forearm (upper arm). 

note: left. and upper arm. cz they tend to feel insecure if u hold their hand (as in the lower arm/palm/fingers) cz they need to feel/sense ur body movement as u walk to get a sense of direction.

2. if due to religious hindrances u cant hold a girl's arm, u can just lightly put her left hand on ur shoulder. do not, hold the end of her white cane. xD (has happened)

3. after crossing the road or leading them to a place, let them know that they have crossed and where they are (direction wise), and whether there's drain or steps in front. do not just say You're Welcome and walk away leaving them clueless to where they are.

4. if u see any of them trying to hail a cab, take some time to help them stop the cab and get in. cz roads tend to be busy n noisy so they cant sense whether a cab has stopped in front of them n they dont know where the cab door is.

5. u dont hav2 carry him/her into the cab (true story no kidding some1 has tried doing that b4 xD) what we can do it open the cab door and put his hand at the edge of the door. try to preserve their self dignity by letting them do what they're able to do. :)

6. if u're having a meal with them, let them know where their eating utensils n cup are. indicate positions using the clock system. eg. there's fish at 9 o clock of ur plate, veg at 2 o clock. etc. 

The blind can sms and facebook too. pretty cool right. :)

this post has gone on to a bright side that i dun wana talk about that weird dude anymore. lol. 

b) is suppose to be that he was inherently a mean person and just asked that question to provoke me. which in this case i'm not even going to waste my time acknowledging his presence. there were hurtful words -my friend heard it. 

so yeah, awareness is important. i was amazed at how blind ppl today are so empowered, motivated and  leading successful lives in society. u think u're unlucky? try blindfolding urself (no peeping! :P) and live for a day. u wouldnt, i wouldnt survive 5 minutes. i'm filled with so much respect and awe for them. 

if u would like to volunteer and wonder how u can help, u can approach the MAB (Msian Association for the Blind) and give ur time to help turn ordinary books into Braille by reading/typing. 

have a great day ahead folks! :)