to date i've thought of some new year resolutions. 1 of which was inspired by Carmen when we were just talking about doctors and specialists in hospitals. i've always had a problem of inferiority complex when i'm in the hospital.
- it starts in 3rd year when u enter the hospital and ppl tell u that as a 3rd year medical student, ur position in the hierachy is equivalent to 1 being in a bottomless pit and you have no worth that microorganisms surpass u. lol. they tell u that no1 cares about u, u block the way in ward rounds, u ask stupid questions etc. u get the idea.
- n there's always a fear of offending some1 important (by important the definition varies) and having urself being blackmailed / fail in exams or being kicked out of medical school bcz its simply so easy to do that. as in, bcz medical knowledge is so vast, u can be asked simply anything under the sun in exams and if the examiner wants to fail you, its so easy to find reasons to do so.
- and bcz it's impossible to study everything and unfortunately i don't really have good retention of knowledge, i feel really inferior to senior dr.s who shoot questions at me and i can't answer and generally i feel really dumb.
so... yeah. omg this has turned into a rant. i'll keep in short.
in short, a way to keep ur self esteem leveled and to not be talked down to is, to talk to ppl at the same level in the first place. if u talk up to ppl, they sense u feel inferior, and they tend to talk down to you. making u feel even more inferior.
conclusion: Talk at the same level to ur superiors.
i tried it out. and boy, does it work. not to the extent that i suddenly magically command respect from superiors xD but it helps me stay confident. and i have less fear. having confidence is sth really important to stay sane and happy in medical school. and perhaps later in life and in any other fields of course. *beams* thanks Carmen.
so that was new year resolution no.1. :D to stay confident.
new year resolution no.2 goes into spending more time to develop myself spiritually.
no.3 goes into no i gave up on the 'i will lose weight' resolution cz it never works. xD
so no.3 goes into hmm ok i'm stumped. this shall come later. :P
awesome Christmas weekend with my church youth. recently we just launched our new NGO, called My3K (no not at all linked to 1Malaysia or any gov propaganda hehe). the NGO works on giving free public health screening - esp to rural areas, mobile clinic style in collaboration with the National Kidney Foundation & National Glaucoma Society and to be a medium for the depressed/single mothers/pregnant teenagers to obtain help. so here we are in our centre in Setapak. :) a group photo of the volunteers after the health screening.
organised a Christmas party with Alain, Mei Mei, Alisa and Siaw Khing.
and got to meet up with Cher! :D
orthopedics has been pretty interesting. i dreaded the thought of bones and metal stuffs at 1st but its more interesting than i thought. hehe! tho there's the constant dread of having to wake up in the wee hours of the morning (groans....) to cover beds for ward rounds..
ward rounds can be an interesting time for observation. among our topics of discussion (betwn just the medical students la xD): who's better looking? ; did that dr. wear the same shirt as yesterday?; my gawsh all these dr.s are so HUGE (tall / huge biceps / strong looking) - in between the proper discussion which goes on among the dr.s. heeh.
another long wkend! yay! orthopedic surgeons are generally very nice and easy going. the only part is their high probability of postponing or cancelling classes with u last minute when they get whisked off to emergency operations.. which is of course no1's fault but bcz of the surgeon's commitment to his job n the patients. strike 3 in just today itself: 1 lcd projector refused to work in a 7.15am class, and 2 other surgeons cancelled class after a 1 hour wait. sobs.
ok. enough ranting. :D all the best in coming up with awesome new year resolutions!
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